Quotes for Friendsgiving From Some of Our Favorite Friends

As part of the Netflix Stream Team, we received product to facilitate this post. I have not received monetary compensation and opinions are my own.

The idea of Friendsgiving is a pretty new concept to me, or I should say that there is an actual name for having dinner with friends the day after Thanksgiving. We call it dinner and my Friendsgiving takes place on Thanksgiving. Friendsgiving is for friends and Thanksgiving should be spent with family, we combine it all.

Thanksgiving has never been a favorite holiday for me but over the years I have become a fan because we have opened the door to friends to share the day with us instead of sulking about wondering what happen to big family meals. When the husband and I started dating we would spend Thanksgiving at the movies and when we started our family I never had to cook dinner again, he does it all.

This year, we will be spending it with extended family and friends and I am certain there will be movies involved - there always is. Some of my favorite movies are buddy movies and how their friendships survive the toughest trials. I remember crying like a baby in My Girl and laughing all the way through Wayne's World. 

Came home to this #cozy scene. RD watching My Little Pony on @Netflix cuddled in bed. #streamteam #bohoblogess #bloggersgetsocial #instamood #instakids #photooftheday #mylittlepony

A photo posted by Mary Johnson (@mryjhnsn) on Nov 11, 2014 at 5:30pm PST

Of course, there are some great TV shows about friendship as well and my little one loves to watch My Little Pony and both kids are hooked on Adventure Time. I must say, I am a fan of it as well. We also watch a lot of Scooby Doo and Phineas and Ferb. All of these buddy shows are great to open the door to discussing people's differences and finding ways to get along with others.  

This Thanksgiving we will be watching Free Birds, at my son's suggestion, and I am planning to watch some Doctor Who. To me, the ultimate in buddy entertainment. 

Here are more fun quotes from some of our favorite friends

When Six Year Olds Fight

He walked through the front door, passed me with out a word and went straight to his room.  I knew something was wrong when Goofy was dropped off after his play date but even the mom who dropped him off was confused over the details.  All she knew was her little girl, was a crying mess in the car, apologizing for what ever horror she could have done and my boy was sulking.  They are six, how bad could a fight be? Oh, the troubles of the youth.

The day started at the beach and their troubles started there as well.  How, I am not sure but if I was to guess I would say it was because Baby wanted to hold hands with Goofy's friend.  There seems to be a tension between them that I can only explain as the Jealousy Effect.  They can only play with each other, when they are in each others company.  They can not have any other form of competition for attention from other would be friends or siblings.  And, they can get mean, they know which buttons to press.  In other words, they are the jealous sort.

My son's empathy trait is also sorely, um, underdeveloped?  He has not been able to master other people's feelings or always respond appropriately to certain social situations.  He is not good at putting himself in other people's shoes and that day he was really struggling with trying to understand why his gal pal did not want to play the game he wanted and why it was more appealing to play with Baby instead of doing what he wants.

In other words, my boy was being a brat.  He was in full out jerk mode.  I was beside myself.  How do you teach them that a friend that puts up with his idiosyncrasies is a blessing and you better treat her right?   Oh, wait they are six! 

By the second rest period, they had made up and were friends again.  They even wanted to play a little longer at her house and after a quick call to her mom, their play date was extended.  As we walked back to the car I heard her say, "we had a really bad break-up but I am glad we are together again."

sigh

Fast forward to the end of the play date and as it turns out, they broke up, again.  This time she was having a bad afternoon.  My guess - it was a really long day and they were both just tired.

Goofy was just sick about it, or in his words, "spiraling out of control."  When prompted all he could say was that he did not understand what he was feeling, but he wanted to apologize.  He hurt inside and was afraid she would never want to see him again.

So, I called his gal pal's mom, dreading the call because what six year old calls to apologize?

Apparently,  the gal pal wanted to call, too.

I am very proud of both of  them and a little scared.

Remember what it was like to have your first friend?  Do you remember what it was like when you had your first fight?  

I must admit, I am no stranger to fighting... read about my fight when I was six here.

New Post!When Six Year Olds Fight goo.gl/fb/Pdbmx #goofy #emotions #friends
— MryJhnsn (@mryjhnsn) July 11, 2012

My First Pinterest and Blogger Love for Parents.com Nominees

I made my first board on Pinterest!  I have been thinking about this for awhile and as I was browsing Parents.com Best Blog Awards I though - this could be a board!  I now know so many bloggers (or at least follow them) that I can vote and mean it!  I even nominated one of these amazing blogs!

So, without further delay... Go check out my, very-first-board, and if you feel so inclined, vote for these amazing blogs (or at least check them out)!  

All Aboard! Lodi Station Outlet Mall

I am not a mall person.

I know... someone take away my suburb card away.  I was never a mall rat (though I love the movie) and the idea of going to an outlet mall was right there on my 'not to do list'.  I just never saw the point of driving, way down to the middle of nowhere - to shop. At least, not when there is Craigslist and eBay.  Don't care how good the deals are or how much I can save - not going to go.  I should also note that I also don't do Black Friday but I am all over Cyber Monday.

The Husband, on the other hand... quite the opposite and has, on one occasion, shared his appreciation for the outlet mall.  It was okay.  Had some great deals.  Bought Goffy's first pair of Crocs there and a pair for myself.  Other then that... eh.  If we were not all ready out there I would not have made a special trip but it was our anniversary and we went to a day spa near there...

It is because I am just not a shopper.  I do like a good destination spot thought and if it happens to be at an outlet mall... with a train... and it happens to be a blogging meet up... well, what is the harm of checking it out?

So, this past Saturday, the Husband and I took the kids to Lodi Station Outlet for a fun filled day of riding the train, shopping and lunch.  We also invited a friend of the first grader and his mom to really make the outing something special. 

@Nikki_S

We were greeted by the organizer of the day, @Nikki_S (of the Guilty Parent and other things) and she gave us the run down for the day and then we where off and running riding... the train!  There was no way the boys were going to let us do a thing until we rode the train!  It went around (and through) the entire outlet as well as out to the playground (which looks like so much fun) and an open air theater!

The train ride was more then just a ride but a chance to learn a little about the history of the outlet and the trains but to check out the mall before we shopped!  I only wish that they could let us off at a stop to shop and catch the next train.

First Grader's Friend & the First Grader

On a side note...  Chugga Chugga Charlie (the mall's mascot) scared the dickens out of the baby who would jump into my arms when ever she saw him.  I only wish he could have gone shopping with me to keep her in one place so I could shop and not chase her - ha!

Anyway... Back at the station, the Husband checked in at customer service and got a free t-shirt and coupons for Father's Day.  The women who work the counter exceed the customer service standard!  They are welcoming, sweet and super helpful.  We even ended up with balloons for everyone and we bought a t-shirt for the First Grader.  

The Husband took the boys and they went off to look at Pro Tools Clearance Outlet and Black & Decker Outlet [insert manly grunting].  He also managed to stop at Tommy Hilfiger while we ladies (read: me and the other mom) checked out Lane Bryant Outlet and The Children’s Place.  Eventually we met back up for lunch at the Steam Café and ended the day with another train ride!

We got there at noon and did not start heading home until after 4:00 PM.  I would never normally spend that much time in a mall.  Never.  Ever.  But... the day flew by and before I knew I spent a little over $100 and everybody got something.  T-shirts galore for the First Grader, an outfit for baby, some new clothes for work for me... it was a very fruitful day of shopping and everybody had fun.

I am actually looking forward to going back... soon.  Have that new house to buy for and I plan on spending a lot in Kitchen Collection.

Here are a few more pics from the day...

 

I want to especially thank Lodi Station Outlet for including us in this blogger event and also: Carter’s, The Jockey Store, Auntie Anne’s Soft Pretzel, Steam Café, Bath & Body Works Outlet, Caboose Corner, Kitchen Collection, Pro Tools Clearance Outlet, Black & Decker Outlet and Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory for their contributions.  I did not receive any payment to write this but I was give a gift card to shop at the mall.  The opinions expressed in this post are 100% my own.

In case you are wondering where you can get the t-shirt the First Grader is wearing... here.

Friday Friends... My Confession.

I have yet to have a really long lasting friendship with a woman.  I really want to have one but I am not a good girlfriend.  I have guys that are friends, but they are all gay or in a relationship.

It dates back to my first serious boyfriend in my twenties.  He was bad for me.  He was really bad for me on so many levels.  And it was because of him that I distanced myself from many of my girlfriends - my girlfriends were right.  They held on to their reassessment that I did not listen or that I was a bad friend and would not answer my calls after it was over.  I guess they were really not my friends.

My other set of girlfriends drink and they party.  Not that I am against drinking by any stretch of the imagination but they don't have kids or if they do they have grandparents or a  baby daddy to dump the kids with while they drink to access.  I don't drink that much anymore and one to many,  "I can't because..." excuses got me knocked off the phone tree.  I hope when the girls without kids have kids I will make the list again.

This is so not a pity party for me...  I have good girlfriends.  Some have moved away while others, well, others I just can't stand to be around because it is not a give and take relationship.  I can only hear so much about someone's drama without them asking about my life or family.  Then there are the wonderful friendships that I have sort of put on hold because of being pregnant (and stressed) and having the baby (and lack of sleep and stress).  I only hope that now that the bebe is almost a year and I am starting to feel like me again I will not have ruined the friendships (again).

I have learned from being a bad friend, learned to let go of friends who just aren't friends and learned that some people really are only in your life for a short amount of time.  I also really need to pick up the phone more often and reach out to those who I have lost touch with over the years. 

Thanksgiving... just not what I thought it would be.

A little early for a post about thanksgiving but alas, it is on my mind so here it is...

I have very few memories of my childhood and it takes a lot to remember the ones that I do recall. Add on top of that being told I remembered something wrong and I might as well not bother with trying... What I do recall are feelings and the rest I piece together with a few photographs.

I do remember holidays at my Grandparents' house… I think. I remember sneaking black olives off the table, shinning the silverware, setting the table, a kid's table, the Macy’s parade on the television in the morning, football in the afternoon and lots of family. I remember my female cousins and aunts (which way out numbered the men) cleaning up after the meal and how normal everything seemed.

I do not remember the number of actual family meals that occurred or when they stopped or more to the point when my mom, brother and I were the only ones going to my Grandparent’s/Uncle’s home for the meal. My mom's family, it seemed, where much closer within their own circle then with my mom. I am wrong of course, or so I am told but that is what I feel... so there. For whatever the reason... no more big family dinners. Maybe with out my grandparents the family did not need to get together with everybody. Maybe without my dad none of it mattered. Maybe it is all in my imagination and it was I that just stopped paying attention (okay that one is probably true). Whatever the reason… there where no more big family dinners celebrating the holidays. In fact, the only one that really sticks in my mind was the first one that I cooked, with my mom; at my brother’s apartment in 2001 (might have even been 2002). That was fun. And, it was the Thanksgiving I had been craving and have been trying to recreate ever since.

We all gathered around the table, passed plates of food and enjoyed each other. Afterwards we watched football. Now, by “we all” I mean… my mom, my brother, my brother’s friend who lived with us in high school, my now husband and I feel like there might have been a girlfriend of my brother there and his friend's girl but eh… they are not there now so I could care less. It was wonderful. It was also the last like it.

Once my son was born and the husband (who was the boyfriend) moved in together there was never a formal sit down dinner together again. For one, we did not live in a place that could accommodate everybody at a sit down dinner until after my mom moved to a senior living community and it was hard for her to leave her apartment in bad weather. There have been many open house, eat when ever, type meals with family and friends gathered but nothing like a sit down pass the plates type meal. Also, family and friends seem to be moving away, moving on and just plain dwindling down till it feels like it is just him, the kids and me. Sigh.

My brother’s girlfriend, whom I adore and is Jamba Mama’s godmother, has a big Irish family and even before that he stopped showing up for family meals. My mom is in a nursing home. His family is scattered to the four corners. Friends who have celebrated in the past either have moved away or have new places to go this year. No more gatherings.

This year, the husband accepted an invite to celebrate Thanksgiving with friends. We will not have to frantically clean house or spend a small fortune on food but then again there will also be no leftovers… Not what I had hoped for when I imagined passing plates but at least we will be surrounded by friendly faces and someone else’s family. At least, we will be together and for that, I am always thankful.