When Six Year Olds Fight - iNeed a Playdate When Six Year Olds Fight iNeed a Playdate a Blog for Northeast Ohio Moms


When Six Year Olds Fight

He walked through the front door, passed me with out a word and went straight to his room.  I knew something was wrong when Goofy was dropped off after his play date but even the mom who dropped him off was confused over the details.  All she knew was her little girl, was a crying mess in the car, apologizing for what ever horror she could have done and my boy was sulking.  They are six, how bad could a fight be? Oh, the troubles of the youth.

The day started at the beach and their troubles started there as well.  How, I am not sure but if I was to guess I would say it was because Baby wanted to hold hands with Goofy's friend.  There seems to be a tension between them that I can only explain as the Jealousy Effect.  They can only play with each other, when they are in each others company.  They can not have any other form of competition for attention from other would be friends or siblings.  And, they can get mean, they know which buttons to press.  In other words, they are the jealous sort.

My son's empathy trait is also sorely, um, underdeveloped?  He has not been able to master other people's feelings or always respond appropriately to certain social situations.  He is not good at putting himself in other people's shoes and that day he was really struggling with trying to understand why his gal pal did not want to play the game he wanted and why it was more appealing to play with Baby instead of doing what he wants.

In other words, my boy was being a brat.  He was in full out jerk mode.  I was beside myself.  How do you teach them that a friend that puts up with his idiosyncrasies is a blessing and you better treat her right?   Oh, wait they are six! 

By the second rest period, they had made up and were friends again.  They even wanted to play a little longer at her house and after a quick call to her mom, their play date was extended.  As we walked back to the car I heard her say, "we had a really bad break-up but I am glad we are together again."


Fast forward to the end of the play date and as it turns out, they broke up, again.  This time she was having a bad afternoon.  My guess - it was a really long day and they were both just tired.

Goofy was just sick about it, or in his words, "spiraling out of control."  When prompted all he could say was that he did not understand what he was feeling, but he wanted to apologize.  He hurt inside and was afraid she would never want to see him again.

So, I called his gal pal's mom, dreading the call because what six year old calls to apologize?

Apparently,  the gal pal wanted to call, too.

I am very proud of both of  them and a little scared.

Remember what it was like to have your first friend?  Do you remember what it was like when you had your first fight?  

I must admit, I am no stranger to fighting... read about my fight when I was six here.

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