Parenting Milestones and Dealing With Not Being Needed - iNeed a Playdate Parenting Milestones and Dealing With Not Being Needed iNeed a Playdate a Blog for Northeast Ohio Moms


Parenting Milestones and Dealing With Not Being Needed

Parenting - success is measured by how little you are needed #parenting |

When the kids were little, and by little I mean babies, I ticked off time by their milestones. The first time they smiled, rolled over, first steps - check, check and check.

Now that they are older, the milestones are different. One is starting kindergarten which is its own milestone and the other is facing new social situations as a fifth grader. I wrote about twelve modern milestones for kids, but this past weekend I was faced with my own mom moment milestones. 

I have a running list of my own parenting milestones like the first time I got peed on and the first time they said, "I hate you."  

Also on my list is caring for that pet fish someone gave us randomly and the tears when it died. Hell, we've had two pets run away. We've dealt with visiting a loved one in a nursing home to their final visit before they passed as well as the funeral and burial. My list sort of ends there. 

What more could possibly secure my job as a parent?

Okay a lot more, but am I really ready to face them growing into adults?

Just Keep Swimming

Ever since my little one was willing and able to get in the pool, I've been looking forward to the day she would not need me to be in there with her. I could just sit by the pool and read while occasionally glancing up to show approval. 

Of course, when the time came where she could be alone in the kid's area, she was ready for the shallow end of the big people's pool and I was not ready to let her swim alone. Sure she could stand and the water reaches her belly and even at the deepest end she can cling to the wall or paddle but I still felt I needed to be in there with her. 

I found that when I am in there with her, she would cling to me. She would not go make friends because I was in the pool. Even when I wouldn't play with her and shoo her away to the other end with the other kids, she would find her way back to me. By the last hour the pool would be open, I was done. I was cold, I wanted to go home, and I was done being wet. 

I saw an opening - a coveted chair by the shallow end and I planted myself down while they ran to the pool for the final swim of the day. She wasn't going to drown, and even if she did get over her head there were twelve lifeguards on duty, her brother in the pool with her, and a slew of helicopter parents.

She didn't drown and she made a friend. I pretended to read as I watched.

The Need for Speed

My second milestone of the day came because the pool closed the men's locker room before the pool closed. No idea why but my oldest had to go to the bathroom and we had to walk home.  He wasn't going to make it at the speed his sister and I were going, so I took a deep breath and gave him my keys. 

He took off on his scooter like a bat out of hell. As he got smaller the further he was from me, I watched as he stopped at street corners before flying across and held my breath at the busy pizza joint's parking lot, but he made it. As a bonus, I did not have to wait for the bathroom when I got home. 

Can't Stop, Won't Stop

So my kids are getting older, taking on more responsibility and challenges. My five-year-old called me from her brother's phone today just to tell me she missed me. I have no idea how she figured out how to unlock his phone, she said he was in another room, but she scrolled through his contacts till he found my face. 

The funny thing about raising kids - it doesn't matter if I'm ready or not, they are and I hope that I'm doing enough that they will go from being good kids to great adults. I've never had a job before where the goal was to be not needed.

Which parenting milestones do you celebrate or are dreading? 

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